Pay It Forward: "Be A Leader!" Advice From Skadden's CRE Legal Counsel Vered Rabia

How can women better position themselves for success? I think any person, male or female, can position him- or herself for success by becoming a leader. I define leadership not by title or designation but by the impact, influence, and inspiration you can impart to others. To me, the most important qualities of leadership are integrity and humility. When you lead by example, action and deeds, but are also open to others’ feedback, you continuously improve yourself. In addition, I think it’s incumbent on women to seek out mentors in their field, male or female. A mistake that we make all too often is to assume that mentoring is the responsibility of the mentor but there’s no reason people can’t proactively seek out the best mentor to help them achieve their goals.

What has been your biggest challenge or obstacle as a women in your particular role? I think a challenge that women often face in any industry, but particularly a historically male-centric one such as CRE is being underestimated by their peers and being judged by a different standard than men. I think this often results from unconscious bias. It’s important not to “buy in” to the unconscious bias of others because that will become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Women sometimes have, and sometimes are expected to have, less ambitious aspirations for a career than their male counterparts. I have found that men are often judged by their future potential whereas women are judged to a greater degree by their past performance. This is often a barrier to advancement.

I find that the best way to overcome this challenge, and frankly many others, is by exercising patience and leading by example. I believe every person should prove he or she “has the chops” to do the work but women can, and should, speak openly about their aspirations and why they believe they have future potential in spades.

I will come back to this theme often but where real estate is “location, location, location,” I believe success is “mentoring, mentoring, mentoring.” To overcome the challenges that women face in the CRE industry, you should seek out the people whom you believe can help you achieve your aspirations – be proactive and “adopt” them as your mentors.

Where would you say commercial real estate needs to improve for women? In attempting to correct any type of inequity, the solution very often lies with those who may be imposing, or previously have imposed, the inequity upon others. In order for the commercial real estate industry to become more inclusive and open to women, it is incumbent upon the men in the industry to help open doors and encourage women to step through. Men in the commercial real estate industry should mentor women into leadership positions and afford them the same opportunities they do their male counterparts. Some women are assertive enough to demand this result, however, others are not, so if men don’t actively participate in this effort it could reinforce, consciously or not, that women can only tailor their aspirations to the past or current realities rather than to an as yet unmolded future.

What is the best piece of advice you have received and do you have any specific advice for the next generation? The best advice I received was “Don’t give up.” It was phrased slightly differently – in a way that was less politically correct — but that was the gist. No matter what path you pursue in life there will always be hard days and sometimes harder days. I believe it’s important to remember that being a leader is not a popularity contest. There will be times when others, whether out of frustration, resentment or lack of desire, will not respond kindly to the demands of a job. The key for the leader though is to find a way to navigate through all personalities to try and find the consensus that will achieve the common desired goal.

My advice to the next generation: Forge consensus; listen better (It is an art!), and always keep learning.

Today, the phrase I often hear is, “Do what you love.” The truth is that I don’t know that anyone loves what they do 100% of the time but I also don’t think that is what is meant by the phrase. I find that people succeed when they are genuinely interested and passionate about what they do.

I fell into the CRE industry somewhat unintentionally. When I came to Skadden as a summer associate, as I learned more about the industry, I realized that I loved the tangible quality of the real estate industry where you can literally touch and feel what you work on. When I decided to commit to CRE as my practice area, I sought out those people who I believed could best mentor me to achieve and support my goals.

What, in particular, can women bring to the table as the industry continues to grapple with the COVID-19 crisis? I think women have a unique ability to bring empathy in this moment. Generally speaking, women are good listeners and better poised to understand and lead on many aspects that are important as the workforce begins to return. For example, child care remains an issue while COVID-19 concerns continue, and women offer the ability to lead by example on this issue with integrity and insight.